Couldnt sleep well

The conversation is still very clear in my mind, even though it was middle of the night.
I m really shock with the comments. 5 yrs ... things hav not been brought up. But now, i really dunno how to face it. I tot, i'd made a significant exist in his life. I tot I have change and lighten up his dark world underneath.
Perhaps misreabling it.

M i juz too strong to every other ppl???? Do i look so tough? I am juz a lil creature. A woman who wants to be at the back of a strong man. I juz wanna sumbody to stand up for me, assist me in making decision, lead me when i m lost. I dun wanna be to take the lead anymore.

Whoosh ..
tired .. exhausted .. confused
Finally willing to let go.
fly high .. kite ~